Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Newbies

We have officially tried our hand at the baby registry!

FUN!!!!

However….with not having a clue on a lot of items….I’m sure folks will be wondering why we asked for 5 bottles of baby shampoo or 10 different types of pacifiers!  Newbies.

I have been loving everyone’s help with baby product advice.  As I keep receiving advice…..I will adjust my registry accordingly! :)

Regardless of whether we registered for the right things or not….we had soooooo much fun!  Husband was a little crazy with the gun.  I just kept hearing beeping and would turn around to see him registering for something random!  He said it looked like something Eleanor needed! hahah!  He’s adorable. 

Oh and this:

We had discussed before we went in that we were only going to register for GENDER NEUTRAL items!!!!!!  We thought we would be smart and be able to use the goods for all of our kids down the road (Lord willing!) 

Smart thinking right?

Well, as soon as we saw the pink jogging stroller…..husband was clicking that gun within seconds!!!!  I was obsessed too! We were both pushing that thing through the aisles of Babies R Us making sharp turns just for fun…..plugging our phone into the onboard speakers…..talking loudly and laughing…..going on and on about how much we loved it!

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From that moment I knew gender neutral was out the window.  Way out!!!!

However, I did talk him out of the pink highchair with flowers.  ;)

Ohhhhhh wait…..we did pick out a gender neutral pack n play!!!! Go us!

We are not totally failures. 

What can we say, we are beyond excited to have a baby girl in our house.  And husband wants to get her anything and everything!!!!!!!!! 

HOW DO YOU CONTROL YOURSELF WITH ALL THE CUTE CLOTHES??????   We are in serious trouble people! 

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Look at me….registering for a gender neutral boppy!!!! :)  I can still buy a pink cover to satisfy our weirdness right?

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Mr. Tim’s face through the entire process!!!!  It’s true!

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My favorite part was parking in the special parking spot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I have waited years to be able to do that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  weeeeeee!  Now…..every grocery store NEEDS these signs!  Seriously!

Oh and this:

Eleanor will be here in 3 1/2 months!!!!!!!!!!!  What?!  I am thrilled yet afraid because that does not sound like very long to get a TON of stuff done. If she comes and we don’t have everything perfect for her…..she will still have a warm and happy home to live in!  And that’s all that matters. 

I hope you’re having a great week!!! 

Lots of Love to you!

xo,

Amanda

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Trusting

So, sometimes I get worried. 

Shocker….I know!

It’s true that I’m a professional worrier! 

The other night, Tim and I were in bed reading.  He was working on a Bible study and I was writing in my journal. 

Earlier, I had mentioned to Tim that I was worried because I hadn’t felt Eleanor move in awhile.  He calmed me down….as always.  (he’s a pro!)

I just started writing down my prayer requests and started praying for Eleanor.  I always pray for her about different things….but I was specifically praying for her that night.  While I was praying, I felt Tim put his hand on my belly.  He was just resting it there while he did his Bible study.  (love love!)

All of a sudden in the middle of my prayer, I felt a kick!  My eyes opened and I looked over at Tim.  His eyes were about to pop out of his head.  Until this time, Tim hasn’t been able to feel her move.  She had just been doing little flutters.  We had been hoping for him to feel her soon!  Well, there was no mistaking this!  Not only did he feel her kick….she kept moving around for us and he got to feel her quite a bit! 

We were just in complete amazement!  Amazed at getting to feel her move and how God answers our prayers.

Even in the midst of my fear and worry, God gave me a little peace.  And at the most special time. 

I’m just so amazed at God!  He continues to prove himself faithful to us….in the good times and the bad.  He is always faithful. 

It’s like God was trying to tell me……hello, Amanda…..trust me!!!!!

Infertility grew me in my faith and relationship with God.

Pregnancy is growing me in my faith…..

and I know being a momma will be a whole new chapter of trusting HIM!

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.”  Proverbs 3:5-6

Monday, January 23, 2012

Becoming Parents 101

It’s time for another addition of Becoming Parents! 

Thank you sooooooo much for all your advice on strollers last time.  I read every single word and have been thinking so much about it all.  It was very helpful.

So here is what I have been thinking about lately…..

Bath Time!

We went to Babies R Us over the weekend and saw all the many kinds of tubs. 

Here are my thoughts:

1) We have a tiny house and I’m not sure where to put a gigantic tub like some of them we have seen.

2) Is it necessary to get a gigantic tub with sprayers and other fun things?

3) So, what is this about washing your baby in the kitchen sink?  How does that work and many weeks do you wash them in the sink?

4) Have I heard somewhere that you are suppose to cover your baby with a blanket of sorts while they are getting their bath?

Alright ladies…..I would love your advice!  And just for fun….and few pictures of what I believe are real baby bath tubs out there. (found on google!)

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Baby Eleanor in the spin cycle! hahaha!!!!!

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This could be a toy….but no one can be sure.

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Annnnnnd GO!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

10 on Thursday

Hello & Happy Thursday!!!!

Thank you for all your kind comments about our infertility story.  You guys are so great.  I am praying that God uses it to help others going through similar situations.  Hugs to you all! :)

So here is the Thursday rundown:

1.  Missouri weather is nutso!  We had a 60 degree day this week and a 30 degree day this week!  I wish it would just be winter for a few weeks and then we can move on to spring (and closer to meeting baby E!)  However, I do like to enjoy each season to the fullest! 

2.  My nails have been painted for over a week now and not a single chip!!!!! It’s a record for me.  Go ESSIE nail polish!  Mr. Tim picked out the color for me and put it in my stocking this year.  :)  He’s pretty adorable. 

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3.  If you are a Vera Bradley lover…..their new spring patterns came out this week! weeeee!  I happen to fancy this new pattern!

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4.  We have ate dinner at home every night this week!!!!! YES!  And it’s been healthy too. 

5.  Eleanor’s room is now cleared out and ready for STUFF!!!  We don’t have anything yet.  Except for a few clothes that we couldn’t resist, a few of my stuffed animals and a few precious things from my parents.  We had better get on the ball, cause time is ticking! 

6.  THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR RESPONSES TO MY STROLLER POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It was a huge help!  Really.  I am planning on posting another question soon. 

7.  Husband and I are completely obsessed with V8 Splash at the moment!  Sooooo good.  Our favorite is the Mango Peach.  I also enjoy the Berry Blend. :)

8.  God has been working in some very special ways around our house lately.  It’s been good! 

9.  I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  :) 

10.  This is a rather old picture of us….maybe 4 years ago.  But I saw it today and it made me smile!

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I hope you are having a great day so far!!! 

Lots of love!

Amanda

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus. Part 3

If you have not read part 1 & 2 of the story go here and here.

It’s September 2010 and Tim is scheduled to have his surgery.  Two days before his surgery…..I get a positive pregnancy test!  Okay, more like several positive pregnancy tests!  We were in complete shock!  How could this be?  We could not stop crying and laughing and praising the Lord!!!  We then started trying to decide if we should go through with the surgery or not.  The surgery would be expensive, take Tim away from work for about 3 weeks, take him away from church, and not to mention hinder his lifestyle and cause quite a bit of pain.  We decided to go through with it even though I was pregnant.  We knew we wanted several children and his problem could eventually cause him health issues down the road.  So with mixed emotions, we prepare for surgery. 

He did great in his surgery!  I was so proud of him and so thankful that he was willing to go through this for our family.  I absolutely hated seeing him in pain though.  Recovery was slow and painful….but he was doing good.  What kept a smile on our faces through his recovery was knowing that I was pregnant!!!!!!  We were so thrilled and talked about our baby non-stop! 

We went to our first two doctor appointments to check on me and our little one.  Tim was even able to make it to those….even though he wasn’t feeling the best.  After our second doctor appointment, Tim took me to Barnes & Noble for us to pick out some pregnancy books.  He even bought me a special journal to record our journey and got me a special ink pen too!  (I’m slightly obsessed with ink pens!)  We also started making plans on how to make our big announcement to our friends! 

The next month our church was having revival services!  It was such a neat time because our hearts were so full and we were so thankful for what God was doing in our life.  At the beginning of our revival (around Sunday) I had started having some light spotting.  I wasn’t sure if I should be alarmed or not.  I called our doctor to let her know about it.  She said light spotting can be common in early pregnancy and not to worry about it.  She said to call if I started cramping or having heavier spotting.  My fears were pretty much eased. 

On Tuesday night of our revival it was my turn to sing on the praise team!  I love singing at our church.  We were almost done with our last song and I felt a huge gush of something wet.  I knew immediately that it was a lot of something but I wasn’t sure what it was.  I started to feel really sick.  The song could not get over fast enough.  I was really worried that people could see whatever this wetness was on my pants.  I walked quickly off the stage and headed straight to the bathroom.  I normally just go sit down in the pew next to Tim when I am done, so he was wondering what I was doing. 

I get into the bathroom and find out that the gush I felt was blood.  Not just spotting….but bright red blood.  And it was everywhere!  I couldn’t stop it.  My underwear was soaked.  I didn’t have anything with me to help it.  I was in too much fear and panic to cry.  I tried to clean myself up as best I could. 

Tim and I left right away to head to the ER.  He was driving like a maniac if I remember right.  I still could not cry.  Neither of us said a word to each other on the drive to the ER. 

To be continued…..

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Belly pictures

So, I am a bad pregnant lady because I have not been documenting the belly growth very well!  I have heard from several of you ladies that you want to see the belly!  Well, I shall show you today.

I am frustrated at myself for not taking weekly pictures.  I really wanted to….but got busy and forgot.  Really there is nothing to take pictures of in the early weeks anyway right?!

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Here I am at a church event…..i’m pregnant but have no idea yet!!!!  That is so fun looking back on pictures where Eleanor was sneakily growing inside of me!

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So you can’t see my belly in this pic…..but we were on a camping trip in early September and I had no idea I was pregnant!  I was very suspicious though.  I was late and felt really awful.  We found out the day after our camping trip! :)

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So yeah….I didn’t take a belly pic until about 16 weeks! lol!  Here I am on my birthday (nov. 28th) 16 weeks pregnant.  Of course Maddie had to be in the picture.  She always does.  :)  There was some definite roundness going on but not full on belly.

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I took this in the bathroom at church one morning! It was about 17 weeks. Please note:  It is rather hard to take a cell phone bathroom picture while not making a weird face.  I have yet to master this! So my apologies. 

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I took this one in the bathroom at work! ha! I was about 18 weeks.  And I was so excited cause I really looked pregnant in this picture!!!!!  I texted this picture to Tim after I took it and he said he looked at it all day. :)

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Here I am on Christmas day about 19 weeks.  It’s hard to tell in this picture since I wore black.  But the belly is there for sure!

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Alright….another bathroom pic at work at about 20 weeks.  I like these types of shirts with the side ruching cause they make my belly look round.  (this is probably one of the only times in my life i will say that! haha!)

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Bathroom work picture at 22 weeks (which is this week!)  so you are now all up to date! This week has been a game changer for the belly.  I woke up Monday and felt like it looked wayyyyy bigger!  They say it just happens like that.  It’s so funny. 

Random Pregnancy Thoughts:

(since I have been bad & haven’t done weekly updates!)

*The first trimester wasn’t too shabby.  I was only sick until about week 10….and I was able to hold back on the throwing up part!  I was super nauseous though.  And all I wanted to do was sleep!  That part was soooooo crazy!  I would come home from work and CRASH on the couch.  I felt like a lazy bum. 

*I really have not had any food aversions.  I hated salad for a few weeks….but that was it. 

*I haven’t craved anything except pizza!  Give me pizza….lots of it!!!!!!!!!! :o)

*However, I did buy a jar of dill pickles to eat as a snack.  Husband gave me a weird look like “here come the cravings”.  But I don’t think it was a craving.  It just sounded like a yummy snack.  I dunno!

*I have not missed anything at all.  Expect maybe drinking route 44’s from sonic and eating cookie dough ice cream! But that is it.  Oh and maybe sleeping on my tummy.  That was sad to give up.  But I would do anything or Eleanor!

*The ultrasound was the most amazing thing of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Geez I could not stop crying! The ultrasound tech kept asking me if I was ok. It was just so incredible to see our baby girl on that screen after all these years.  I can’t describe the feeling.  But I couldn't stop the water works.

*Humidifier…..I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

*I keep trying to like the bella band.  But it really annoys me since I go to the bathroom all.the.time!  I feel like I never have it in a good position and I’m always messing with it. I should just be allowed to wear sweats everyday.

*Mr. Tim is the most amazing pregnancy husband in the world! The man keeps me calm and sane.  He does everything in his power to make me feel comfy and happy.  He is so very precious.

*Speaking of Mr. Tim….he has started having us go in Eleanor’s room to pray for her everyday.  It is such a special time!  Cue the water works again.  Oh I’ll just say it….I CRY ALL THE TIME!   There, I said it.

*Being honest…..I am deathly afraid of taking the glucose test.  I’m afraid of the test and scared of having GD. 

I will end the pregnancy update there for now! 

Consider yourself up-to-date!!!!!!!

Hugs!

Amanda

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Oh…just a few weeks behind.

I just realized that I never shared any Christmas pictures on the blog!  I’m late in the game.  Plus, we just took our tree down!!!  I have been sick for a few weeks….so it’s putting me behind on everything.  I’m sure there are still some folks out there with there trees up!!! :)  Our house is still not back in order yet! It feels good to get organized though!

I’m not posting many pictures…..but you know….it’s the thought that counts!

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We continued our tradition of allowing each other to open one gift on Christmas Eve!!!!!  We are such kids!  Sadly, the first gift Tim opened was a bomb….and he had to exchange it! ha!

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Christmas morning!  We opened our gifts to each other when we got back from church.  I had a nasty cold and was feeling pretty lousy.  But I tried to look awake and excited in all the pictures!  Cause I’m the crazy picture lady….and I must have mah memories!!!!!

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Miss Maddie opening her stocking!

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I don’t have any pictures of our Christmas Eve festivities really……because we had a little incident with Miss Maddie.  A big dog attacked her and she had to go to the vet immediately.  It kinda ruined my day and I cried and cried and cried! lol!  I will share more of what happened later.  I’m so glad she was still able to open her stocking on Christmas day! She’s a champ!

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My momma cooking our Christmas Day meal!

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Everyone’s favorite sweet potatoes.  Except….I prefer mashed with gravy please!

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My sweet nephews opening their Christmas!

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And finally Christmas card picture bloopers!  Maddie wanting her sweater off NOW! haha!

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It was a Christmas we will always remember, with Maddie’s accident and being pregnant with Eleanor….and being sick!  But it was very special!

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I hope you have a fabulous Wednesday!!!!!!! 

Lots of Love!

Amanda

Monday, January 9, 2012

Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus. Part 2

If you have not read part 1 of our journey through infertility, go here.

Here is part 2:

It’s January 2010.  It has been one year since we started trying to have a baby.

I made an appointment with my doctor for a check up to see if there might be any reason I would have trouble getting pregnant.  My doctor didn’t see any reason why I would have trouble, but she wanted to run a test on me to be sure.  She wanted us to wait a few more months to see if we got pregnant and then if not, come in for this test. 

We did not get pregnant in those months, so we scheduled the test for me in March.  I was going in for an HSG test.  The test runs dye through your fallopian tubes.  X rays are taken as the dye passes through your uterus and tubes.  This will reveal if you might have trouble getting pregnant.  This test was very very uncomfortable.  And was the first time I felt very scared about this whole journey.   The process of getting an HSG was different than anything I had ever done.  I didn’t want to be going through this. 

Thankfully, my test results were good.  But we still had the news about Tim’s problem looming over us. 

Tim went back to the doctor for a consultation to figure out what step we should take.  The doctor wanted to do surgery on Tim to correct his varicocile.  He was positive it would improve our chances of getting pregnant. 

Surgery?!  On his man parts?!  I’m sure you can imagine the fear we were feeling.  Do we really have to do this?  We decided to take some time to think and pray about all this. 

During these months we continued to “try” and do everything under the sun that might help us get pregnant!  We tried cutting caffeine.  We exercised like maniacs.  I never missed a day at taking my temperature.  I would spend hours analyzing my charts.  Just being honest here….we had sex all. the. time.  I read books on getting pregnant.  I joined online communities to get support and ideas.  Most importantly our prayers were  filled with pleas for the Lord to fill my womb.  My journal was filled with prayers, verses, songs and tear stained pages. 

We were living a nightmare in silence. 

Infertility is NOT talked about.  No one knows much about it….unless you personally know someone going through it.  It is a dark and lonely journey. 

I wish I could explain to you the pain that is known through infertility.  Finding out a dear friend is pregnant is just about the most crushing news….though you are truly happy for them.  You sit through baby shower after baby shower for different people and long for that to be you.  You have to sit through Mother’s Day sermons at church and fight back tears while you ache to be included in that blessed group of women.  You hear of numerous babies  being had by unwed teen girls and struggle with anger and questions of why.  You want to punch the next person that asks you when you are having a baby (even though you really wouldn’t do that, because they don’t mean anything by it…but it HURTS!)  You spend an hour on the toilet sobbing when another month has gone by and you find you have got your period again. 

At this point in our journey, we had not talked about this to anyone.  We had truly believed that we would get pregnant soon and still wanted to surprise people!  I think I was also in denial that this was actually happening to us.  It was so hard to understand.  I didn’t understand how we loved the Lord and served Him faithfully and he still hadn’t granted us with this request.  Why can all these other women have babies and not me?  Have I done something wrong?  We spent hours examining ourselves to make sure there was nothing in our life that we thought would keep God from giving us a baby. 

Our faith was tested.  Our prayer life was tested.  Our marriage was tested. 

We went through the summer of 2010 and still all bad news. 

We went on a fun beach vacation and just knew it would happen then!  Everyone says….if you just relax if will happen!  What could be more relaxing than the beach right?  Wrong. 

It’s September (2010) and we decide to schedule Tim’s surgery.  Two days before Tim’s surgery we find out I’m pregnant.

To be continued….

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Becoming Parents 101

Last weekend, Tim and I decided to venture out and look at baby stuff for the first time! How fun!  There is soooooooo much stuff!   *yikes*.

We stopped off for lunch and I confessed to Tim that I felt really overwhelmed by all the choices for different things.  How in the world are you suppose to know what to buy?  What is the best thing?  What will be right for Eleanor?  He said he wasn’t stressed at all! haha!  Of course not. He said we will just research it.  The only thing is…..research kind of stresses me out too! :) 

So, I am enlisting all my blog friends for help!  You ladies (that are mommas) have so much info to share.  And I know a lot of you have written special posts about baby products etc.  Every now and then I am going to post about a certain item that I am “stressed” about and I would LOVE LOVE your info and input!  Or if you have already written a post about that item feel free to post the link so you don’t have to retype anything. 

Baby item #1:

Strollers!

Goodness….they make a billion different types of strollers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Is it possible to only buy one stroller and have it work from infant to toddler???

*Can a jogging stroller hold an infant and can you take it into stores as well???

I just recently received some advice from a seasoned mom that said she advised to buy a jogging stroller because it will work for everything.  She said her regular stroller just didn’t work for them when they would have to go to baseball games etc. 

I found this gem on Babies R Us website….

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It seems like it might cover all the bases?  But I’m not sure!

So ladies……please share your nuggets of wisdom with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lets talk strollers! :) 

xo,

Amanda

Monday, January 2, 2012

Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus.

I have been meaning to share our story for a long time….but for different reasons, I did not.  I feel very comfortable sharing it at this time.  Plus I hope to encourage others that might be going through a similar situation and just to encourage you in your faith!  Our story is one of learning to TRUST in God and His timing and to have faith that He is for our good no matter what happens.  I am still in awe of what God has done in our life!  Praise Him!

Here is our story….

Tim and I are high school sweethearts!  We started dating at the ripe old age of 15.  We were each others first date, first kiss, first love….first everything!  We never split apart and were married at almost 21 years old. 

Out of all those years of dating and being newlyweds there was something that we never talked about….

Infertility.

That is not something that normally comes up in your newlywed conversations.  Most people, including us, just assume you won’t have any trouble getting pregnant.  You think that whenever you want to start your family…..it will be a piece of cake. 

Well, boy were we in for a surprise. 

This is how our journey began….

In January 2009 we had been married for over 4 years and decided we were ready to have a baby!  A few of our close friends were also starting to have children….so it was going to be perfect!  I stopped taking my birth control and we were going to see what happened.  We knew my body probably had to get adjusted after being on birth control for several years, so we weren’t alarmed after the first few months went by.  We also were not really trying….just stopped preventing.  The summer came and we both decided maybe we ought to get serious and start really trying since nothing had happened.  I studied up on exactly what “trying” meant and I was ready.  And so begins months of temperature taking, tracking, vitamins, scheduled intimacy, examining your toilet paper like a detective and so on and so forth.  It really wasn’t too bad for the first few months.  It was kind of exciting.  But as the months passed we began to feel very discouraged and the excitement wore off.  Fear started creeping in.  Our friends began announcing their pregnancies.  People started asking us regularly about when we were going to have children. 

Tim had to go to our family doctor for a cold in November 2009.  While he was there he just thought he would tell him about our “trying” and if we should be worried.  Our doctor said not to worry yet as it has only been a year and that is fairly normal.  So, our doctor referred Tim to a specialist just to get checked out.  We knew we had to start somewhere. 

A few weeks later, Tim went to see a specialist, and we really didn’t think anything would be wrong.  We just wanted to cover all our bases.  Well, the doctor found something.  He found that Tim had low motility and a varicocile.  They told us the chances of getting pregnant with this issue was very minimal.  How uncomfortable for Tim to go to this doctor to get checked out.  I felt so bad that he had to go through all that.  I will spare you the details. 

The doctor gave us our options.  But first he wanted me to go get checked before we did anything drastic.  I made an appointment with my doctor as soon as she could get me in. 

It’s January 2010 and we are about to begin one of the hardest years we will ever face.

To be continued….